**POSEIDON GETS SALTY**
**I'M BIASED**
If you're going to have a Greek god for a parent, you couldn't do better than Poseidon. Sure, I've had my issues with him. He's not the most attentive dad. But hey, none of the Greek gods are.
At least Poseidon comes with awesome powers and a laid-back attitude (most of the time).
He's pretty cool, especially considering how tough it was for him when he was younger. Being the middle child is never easy. Always compared to his brothers, it was like, "Wow, you're almost as handsome as Zeus! You're almost as powerful as Zeus!" Or sometimes, "You're not as much of a loser as Hades!"
That kind of thing can really wear on a guy after a few centuries.
Back when Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades rolled the dice to divide up the world, Poseidon got the second-best roll. He had to accept his brother Zeus becoming the lord of the universe and telling him what to do for all eternity, but Poseidon didn't complain. He got the sea. And that was fine by him. He liked the beach. He liked swimming. He liked seafood.
Sure, Poseidon might not have been as flashy or mighty as Zeus, who had those lightning bolts that were like Mount Olympus' nuclear arsenal. But Poseidon had his trusty magical trident. With it, he could stir up hurricanes, summon tidal waves, and make a seriously mean smoothie. And because the seas wrapped around the earth, Poseidon could also stir up earthquakes. If he was in a foul mood, he could level entire cities or make islands vanish beneath the waves.
The Greeks called him the Earthshaker, and they took pains to keep him happy because whether you were on land or at sea, you definitely did not want Poseidon mad at you.
Thankfully, Poseidon was mostly chill. His temperament mirrored the Mediterranean Sea where he resided, and most of the time, the Mediterranean was smooth sailing. Poseidon would let ships roam freely, bless fishermen with bountiful catches, and just relax on the beach, sipping his coconut shell umbrella drink without sweating the small stuff.
On nice days, Poseidon would cruise on his golden chariot across the waves, pulled by a team of white hippocampi - those are horses with golden manes, bronze hooves, and fish tails. Sea creatures would come out to play around his chariot, so picture sharks, killer whales, and giant squids all frolicking together, as if saying, "Hooray, Poseidon is in the house!" or something like that.
But sometimes, the sea got angry, and Poseidon was no different. When that happened, he became a completely different guy.
And if you're into horror shows, bloodbaths, deceit, theft, betrayal, and yes, even cannibalism, then keep reading...
Who could recount the true tales of the gods and goddesses of Olympus better than our modern-day demigod, Percy Jackson?
In this thrilling journey through Greek mythology, Percy provides his uproarious personal take on the rivalries, battles, and love affairs of the Olympian pantheon.
Curious about how Zeus climbed the ranks to become top god? How many times Kronos gobbled up his own offspring? How Athena literally burst forth from another god's skull?
It's all laid out here, in bold black and white.
**I'M BIASED**
If you're going to have a Greek god for a parent, you couldn't do better than Poseidon. Sure, I've had my issues with him. He's not the most attentive dad. But hey, none of the Greek gods are.
At least Poseidon comes with awesome powers and a laid-back attitude (most of the time).
He's pretty cool, especially considering how tough it was for him when he was younger. Being the middle child is never easy. Always compared to his brothers, it was like, "Wow, you're almost as handsome as Zeus! You're almost as powerful as Zeus!" Or sometimes, "You're not as much of a loser as Hades!"
That kind of thing can really wear on a guy after a few centuries.
Back when Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades rolled the dice to divide up the world, Poseidon got the second-best roll. He had to accept his brother Zeus becoming the lord of the universe and telling him what to do for all eternity, but Poseidon didn't complain. He got the sea. And that was fine by him. He liked the beach. He liked swimming. He liked seafood.
Sure, Poseidon might not have been as flashy or mighty as Zeus, who had those lightning bolts that were like Mount Olympus' nuclear arsenal. But Poseidon had his trusty magical trident. With it, he could stir up hurricanes, summon tidal waves, and make a seriously mean smoothie. And because the seas wrapped around the earth, Poseidon could also stir up earthquakes. If he was in a foul mood, he could level entire cities or make islands vanish beneath the waves.
The Greeks called him the Earthshaker, and they took pains to keep him happy because whether you were on land or at sea, you definitely did not want Poseidon mad at you.
Thankfully, Poseidon was mostly chill. His temperament mirrored the Mediterranean Sea where he resided, and most of the time, the Mediterranean was smooth sailing. Poseidon would let ships roam freely, bless fishermen with bountiful catches, and just relax on the beach, sipping his coconut shell umbrella drink without sweating the small stuff.
On nice days, Poseidon would cruise on his golden chariot across the waves, pulled by a team of white hippocampi - those are horses with golden manes, bronze hooves, and fish tails. Sea creatures would come out to play around his chariot, so picture sharks, killer whales, and giant squids all frolicking together, as if saying, "Hooray, Poseidon is in the house!" or something like that.
But sometimes, the sea got angry, and Poseidon was no different. When that happened, he became a completely different guy.
And if you're into horror shows, bloodbaths, deceit, theft, betrayal, and yes, even cannibalism, then keep reading...
Who could recount the true tales of the gods and goddesses of Olympus better than our modern-day demigod, Percy Jackson?
In this thrilling journey through Greek mythology, Percy provides his uproarious personal take on the rivalries, battles, and love affairs of the Olympian pantheon.
Curious about how Zeus climbed the ranks to become top god? How many times Kronos gobbled up his own offspring? How Athena literally burst forth from another god's skull?
It's all laid out here, in bold black and white.
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